There is a real dilemma around knowing when to try harder and when to let go and move forward with your life, especially at the cost of losing someone you see serious potential in.
Here are 10 key signs and behaviors to take note of when wanting to know if they are absolutely serious about fixing your relationship.
1. They are willing to put in the same effort and make the same sacrifices as you.
It takes two to tango, a real balanced act. You’ll know they are serious about fixing your relationship if they are putting in the effort you need them to, even if it’s going out of their way to do so.
2. You consistently notice their actions and words are the same.
There’s nothing worse than hearing everything you want to hear and then seeing the exact opposite happen before your eyes. Their actions and their words will be the same.
3. They show up in the ways you need them to.
You don’t have to second guess if they’ve heard you or if your needs are important to them.
4. They fix the things they have the power to fix as soon as they need fixing.
Like I’ve said before, it takes two to tango. Sometimes though, it really is just one person’s deal or problem. And when it’s their deal, you know they are committed to making your relationship feel better by tending to their deal or letting you know how you can support them while they do that.
5. There is no deflection or lack of personal responsibility.
There is no blaming. Blaming = problems that will forever be on repeat.
6. If they know something will hurt you, they won’t do it under any circumstance.
There is a line between unintentionally hurting someone with your words or actions and knowing “___ won’t make them feel my love for them, but I’m going to do it anyway because I’m more focused on me right now”.
7. They make it to where you don’t have to question whether or not you both have the same goal for your relationship/life/family.
No matter how much you want something to work, if you don’t have a similar vision and the same intent, it won’t come to fruition how you want it to. You’ll know your partner is serious about making your relationship work forever when you don’t have to question what they want and if it’s different than what you do.
8. They are willing to have peaceful and open conversations about anything that you need to talk about.
Let’s be honest, some stuff isn’t pleasant or “fun” to talk about. Your partner has to be willing to talk anyway if that’s what you want, and if it will serve a purpose for you moving forward to a better place mentally or in your relationship.
9. They respond differently than they once did.
You’ll see them catch themselves in ways they used to not, you’ll see them become more mindful of what they say and do.
10. They focus more on the solution than the problem.
They won’t try to talk about the same thing from the past a million times, and when bringing up a problem that’s currently happening, they’ll be more focused on how to fix it than the problem itself. You’ll know they are seriously invested in fixing your relationship because fixing it will be the only option in their mind.